yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry