I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
More tranny stories later!
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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