flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
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