im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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