i can't believe i had my finger in that
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
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