he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
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No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
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I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
he just fucked me for my cheese..
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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