Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
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What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
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I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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