Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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