i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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