I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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