If i come over, it means nothing
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
