she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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