remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection