You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
i've created a new STD.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day