dude you need to get laid
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire