You really coming over, don't trick.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Randomize
