yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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