After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
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