i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize