If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
what day is it and did you see me today?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
