I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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