remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize