Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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