yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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