some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
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and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
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