Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.