I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much