i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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