pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize