it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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