I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
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