scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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