It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.