So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize