I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
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