Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
