just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
His nipple licking is glorious
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