Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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