You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
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I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
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Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
my god I love twenty year old dicks