You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Randomize
