He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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