Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.