No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.